Dear Fear, revisited...

So I am TERRIFIED of art journaling...I think.  I guess I'm afraid of not doing it "right".  I'm afraid of painting something ugly, or even painting something I like and then, one too many strokes later, screwing it up!  But I am going to try.  I am tired of being afraid.  Which reminds me of my VERY first blog post over a year ago.  I wonder if that fear ever goes away?  Hmmm....

Below is my first art journal background attempt.  Just like my cooking, it took FOREVER.  Thanks to JournalArtista on youtube.com, I learned this really cool masking technique using Post-Its, and decided to give it a shot.  I'm pretty pleased with it, even if I don't know what to write just yet.  Materials I used on this one:  Canson Mixed Media notebook, Liquitex gesso, Caran D'Ache Neocolor II wax pastels, and a stamp from Michaels.  So, one journal page (almost) down, and now for the next blank page...

It simply must be said:

"Dear Fear, you are NOT the boss of me.  Love, Katie"

You call that ART??

Why yes, I do.  

29 Faces: Face #3 or "Oh my goodness! I drew that??"

Okay, well, technically, I erased it.  Weird, I know, but I saw it in a video.  Cover the entire page with graphite, smudge it around on the page with a paper towel, then erase all of the light spots (and add in a few darks).   About halfway into the first eye (which incidentally was my starting point) I started to think "oh, no...why did I think I could do this??"  Barely into it, I began to doubt that I have the skills to complete a decent drawing!  I mean why should I think that I can?  I have no formal training!  I'm a music teacher!!  Still, I kept going.  Lucky for her, I did, or she'd be a blob of graphite with one eye!  

A couple of things I picked up from the experience:

1.  Those insecure feelings will come.  They always do.  I've got a lot of unfinished projects that testify to this truth.  Today, however, I have one drawing that emphatically shouts:  "Keep drawing!  It's totally worth it!"  

2.  It's really quite amazing what  a little erasing can do.  This drawing started as a dark, scary blob of graphite on a piece of paper.  Perhaps a bit like my life...which often feels like a dark, scary blob of "what am I doing?"  But what if the Lord is in the business of erasing?  What if I can hang on just one more day, sit still, and let Him remove just one more bit of ugly?  As a serious perfectionist, hell-bent on being flawless in my own power (read: exhausted), that actually sounds quite lovely.  Man, am I glad I kept drawing!

29 Faces:  Face #3
Graphite on paper

29 Faces: Face #2

Since I'm a running a bit behind on this challenge, I thought I would post another face.  Oil pastels again.  I'm not usually a fan of being messy with my artwork (though I LOVE other artists' messy work...hmmm) but these have been fun.  Scribble and smudge, and VOILA!  Fancy face #2.  Her eyes are a bit crossed, and I've noticed that it is HARD(!!) to get eyes to look alive.  My girls look a bit spacey in the eyes.  So, artist friends, if you have any tips to share, I'm listening.

29 Faces Challenge: Face #1

So, obviously I've been a bit creatively stuck lately.  Then yesterday I ran across this post at the Willowing blog, and decided that the 29 faces challenge might be JUST what I need to get jump started again.  Armed with some oil pastels (Portfolio and Cray-pas) and a charcoal pencil, this is what I managed to come up with....and it was  FUN!  I needed some fun today.  I'm pretty new at faces, so I was a little surprised that her eyes turned out okay!  Yay, for small victories!    Hope you enjoy the artwork, and feel free to join the challenge!